passport snafu

The scene: 10:30 pm last evening. I am almost lulled to sleep when my husband asks, “Do you know where you passport is?”
Me: Yes, it is in my file folder on the desk
Him: Good. Is it still good?
Me: I would think so…damn I don’t know.
Him: Are you getting up to check?
Me: Are you serious???
Him: Yeah. How do you plan to go on our trip? I will go without you by the way.
Me: Oh no you wouldn’t!
Him: Oh yes I would, now go check.
Me: cursing under my breath as I voyage down the stairs, stumbling over a matchbox car…ouch! More cursing directed at children who don’t put their toys away.....grumble, grumble….can’t believe he is making me check this…cursing…found it! “Oh shit!!!”
Him: What? Oh, let me guess, it has expired?
Me; Yes! And wipe that smirk off your face. You know I will be up all night worrying now. Thanks a lot!!!
Him: Anytime! You will need to take care if that tomorrow.
Me: Really?!? I had no idea.
Him: And don’t be cheap, you had better get that expedited as soon as you can!

Within minutes I hear him snoring loudly, satisfied he has caused me much angst and a sleepless night. All the while I lay there contemplating whether the US Government will process my passport in time for my trip, which is less then a month away and snarling at this deep breathing bear besides me. I hate when he is right!! Maybe if I send cookies or sweets in my envelope they will process it quicker. OR better yet, I will send an exasperated picture of me and the boys and they will instantly pity me and see I need a holiday away from the demonic duo. Please direct all happy mojo and thoughts towards Philadelphia where they will be processing my forms.