Monday, August 11, 2008

cooking katastrophe

Kitchen catastrophes thankfully aren't a common occurrence in our abode. I can say with much confidence that it is because I do not do much of the cooking. Hubby does most of the cooking while I handle the baking. Often times, when I do attempt to cook, it does not end up the way it is supposed to be. Now, don't get me wrong, I do have a handful of staple dinners that I can make that would make your mouth water, but when it comes to cooking any type of meat I am screwed challenged.

My most embarrassing cooking catastrophe was when I tried to make a layered jello dessert for a "Back to School" picnic for all the employees at the school I work for. I was just hired so it was my first picnic and I wanted to make something everyone would enjoy. I pulled out my handy dandy Betty Crocker cookbook and looked for the perfect summer side dish. Ooooo, Jello! Who doesn't love Jello, pretzels and whip cream? I studies the directions, doubled checked to make sure I had all the ingredients and began my masterpiece. I thought everything was going well. The directions seemed easy enough, you just needed to wait between steps. I put the final jello layer on top and placed the dish in the fridge to set. I even left extra time so it could set over night. As I periodically checked on it I noticed it was not setting, in fact it was beginning to seep down into the other layers! I went to bed and sent a prayer to the cooking gods to please, pluuleeze let my Jello set. When I awoke the next morning I saw that the cooking gods truly hated me. There was a layer of ooze on top of the dish and the jello that had soaked through the other layers had gelatinized at the bottom. Crap!! But instead of trashing it (like any normal person would do) and just pick up a store bought side, I threw another layer of whip cream on top and took it to the picnic. Let's just say once the cool temps of the fridge were gone it turned into a dish of goo. Thankfully no one saw me put the dish on the table so I didn't have to lay claim to it during the picnic!

8 comments:

Colleen said...

Oh, that's so me. I've done crap like that ad nauseum. :O)

Alice said...

Oh, and I so hope you looked at the dish and went:
... hey such and such... did you see THAT? OMG! I wonder who made this..."
Ya know... so no one can ever suspect...

Ann said...

I TOTALLY get this!!!
You make me laugh!
I, also, am not the cook in the family. My husband is wonderful at it and enjoys doing it. Lucky me!
I enjoy baking, which he doesn't at all. He says he doesn't like measuring. That's fine. We have our niche.
I actually made a strawberry/rhubarb/ (I first typed rhubarf, which is funny; read on)and blueberry pie. I make a custard filling which had the finished product visually unappealing (hence my laugh at my typo!) but DANG it tasted GOOD!

Diane said...

Oh my gosh, that is exactly why I buy all my desserts. I don't even try!

Kaza said...

This would SO happen to me. But you kick ass anyway. Go see: http://tinyurl.com/5s2e8d

Honey Mommy said...

You are SO like me! I would much rather bake than cook. In the summertime we eat a lot of grilled meat, which is my Honey's department. :o)

Heather said...

That's hilarious. Did you claim the dish after the potluck?

Izzy said...

I had a total cooking catastrophe tonight. Let's just say that no-rise pizza dough? SUCKS! I don't suggest it!