Saturday, October 25, 2008

Forgive Me, Sam, For I Have Sinned

Hello all you lads and lassies! I'm Ali from Home of the Lazy Dog. I'm a nervous lazy dog today. I've never guest posted before and I'm afraid that with this one post I may single-handedly drive away all of Kat's readers. Please bear with me!

Actually, I'm really glad to have this opportunity to guest post. I have a confession to make and I just don't feel comfortable baring my soul like this on my own blog. Here it goes: I'm a thief. A dirty, rotten, unintentional thief.

Here's the story. Last year I bought some new Halloween lights to go on the front porch. When I got home, I opened up one of the boxes and found not only the lights that I had purchased but a rose that I had not purchased. A decorative black rose to match my now dark, cold, criminal heart.

And what did I do for atonement? Did I return it to costumer service? Did I slip the $1 plus tax to the elderly greeter on my next visit? Did I put it in my purse and make a trip to their restroom and "accidentally" leave it sitting beside the sink?

No. No. And no. You see, Walmart actually owes me $52 in quarters that I've lost in their Sam's Choice soda machines.

It's obvious. We are both corrupted.

13 comments:

Casey said...

Ha, I know that guilty feeling all too well. I accidentally stole something from Target (it was their fault for not ringing it up). I got home and unloaded the kids before I realized the error and there's no way I was driving back for $4.

Renée aka Mekhismom said...

Ali, great post. I don't know why you were worried. And that is not stealing - it was in the box. I wouldn't have returned it either - simply because I am too lazy to go back out once I am in the comfort of my own home.

Kat said...

LOVE it! I have had that happen a few times as well and I was too lazy to go rectify the situation. Plus, there have been plenty of time I was over charged so I think of it as karma. Great post :)

Dawn said...

Oh Ali, you aren't a thief! You are just lazy!! ;-) I'm kidding. I have actually accidentally wound up with things I didn't pay for from Wally World too, but I never take it back. They have ripped me off one too many times for me to care. Plus, they have stolen from the small businesses, so I guess I feel I am stickin' it to them in my own way. :-)

Catherine said...

I wouldn't have returned it either! Don't worry I won't turn you in.

angie said...

I think in your post about buying food from the farmer's market, you said it was like giving Walmart the finger and you liked that. So, are you sure 'stealing' the black rose was intentional?

Putz said...

i have lost money in wall mart pop machines...i think that is the way they stay in business like arby's offering one dollar arby roast bveef...noboday can do thart

LiteralDan said...

Don't feel so bad-- I had the same thing happen to me at Wal-Mart with a throw pillow they were clearing out after Christmas. Turns out the cashier wasn't as good at math as she

Oh well-- they would have laughed me out of the store for wasting their time with the 50 cents or whatever it was.

Jenn said...

Just wanted to thank you for stopping by on my BATW tour day, sorry I'm getting back to you so late.

kel said...

Nothing wrong with that.. just think of it as a bonus! And you are right, those soda machines suck!!

Putz said...

i am not sure how god feels about you right now,,, a rose a black rose....someone out there probably wantnted to buy that rose, fake rose for a special biker or tatoooed motor cyclist...and you took it

Jennifer said...

Oh been there!! One time, my little one had a pair of shorts stuffed next to her in the buggy and I didn't know until we were out!

Tara @ Feels like home said...

How many things has my toddler stuffed into the cart, my bag, her stroller? It's embarrassing. Thanks for making light of every mother's sticky situation. :)